Monday, April 7, 2008

Is this some sort of joke?

I debated on whether or not to post, but am just having one of those days when you just need to vent. Long story short: I took a glucose test at last Friday's high risk and ultrasound appointment to check for gestational diabetes. I was called today saying I didn't pass, and need to go to a lab for a 4 hour period to have my fasting glucose checked out. Unbelievable. This is awful to say, but it is days like these that I get so angry at my body and wonder if they are signs from somewhere else telling me that I am not supposed to have a baby. I've tried to live a healthy, active lifestyle with plenty of exercise and a well-balanced diet. I have never had hypertension or diabetes. I get pregnant; morning sickness beyond belief; start to feel good; can handle food finally; feel up to exercise; then SMACK! I develop gestational hypertension. Well, there goes the exercise. I am told brisk walking is even a little risky. Followed by: uh-oh, your baby is too small. More tests. Then, this glucose test, and the possibility for gestational diabetes comes into the picture. What is the treatment? Moderate exercise. Wait, I can't do that because of the hypertension!

Maybe there is some bigger lesson in all of this, but to be honest, today I am feeling selfish and angry. I'd rather read about the lesson than live it.

Gratitudes:

-This is hard on days like today. I am thankful for a lovely day planting some beautiful flowers on the deck with Eric.

No Nixed names. I haven't consulted the husband. Apologies.

8 comments:

  1. Hi Ali:
    It's ok to be angry and frustrated, I don't blame you. You are probably the healthiest person I know and it absolutely stinks that you are having to go through this. I am so sorry, but I guarantee you it will all be worth it once you see little Linus peeping up at you through squinted ointment-covered eyes!
    Stay strong,
    Renata

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  2. This too shall pass and you will have a beautiful little boy in your arms before you know it!

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  3. No doubt about it- it stinks! Thank goodness you have been leading such a healthy life style so that little Linus has a great chance at being a healthy little guy. How about naming him - Miracle? or Hard-Earned???!
    Love,
    Mom

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  4. Oh Ali, that is so very frustrating! You have always been so healthy, and now your body is not your own and it is doing all these crazy things. I have strong faith, though, that you and Little Linus will make it through all of this and you will have a healthy baby in your arms by summertime. Just keep that in mind, and vent away in the meantime if it makes you feel better. You have every right.

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  5. Don't worry Ali, a lot of women get a positive from the glucose screen and after the tolerance test, they don't have gestational diabetes. I'm crossing my fingers for you! Hang in there.

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  6. You most certainly are creating a miracle and the best things in life do not come easily. This has not been easy on you, but you are doing everything you can do be the best mommy - and my lady, you are SUCCEEDING! This is MUCH easier said than done, but be mindful of the stress cycle. Embrace your moments (frustrating or gratious), Deep breaths, time for yourself, rest, giggles wherever you can get them, and acupuncture is what will help you get through these last two months. I know you, Eric, and Little Linus will persevere!!!!!

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  7. Hi Ali,

    These are the times when you wonder "who's idea was this"? Believe me, it's a win-win deal when you "cross the finish line" in June! You are a healthy, vibrant and really HORMONAL, (trust Mama Ginna on the Hormonal part) exercise-deprived pregnant lady. You're living with a gem of a Daddy-in-waiting and will be so filled with gratitude and love in June that you will hardly be able to express all your GRATITUDES without beaming and crying! You're dearly loved and in great hands!
    Trust in yourself, your body and your intuition....it hasn't failed you! It won't now!
    Love, Ginna

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  8. Alison _ We shouldn't take anything for granted, but my not inconsiderable experience suggests that a lot of stuff happens in the billions of pregnancies that have kept the human species going for tens of thousands of years. And before we had all those wonderful methods of monitoring gestation, we muddled through. You seem to be doing splendidly. Keep it up!

    Nana and I are devoted Jeopardy fans. We hope Eric dazzles them !

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