Wednesday, June 6, 2012

Scary Mommy's spot on

One of my favorite blogs is Scary Mommy. I hesitate directing you to it, because then you'll realize how a real blogger is supposed to write. But I do giveaways for my sub par crafts 1.5 times a year! And I have no filter! And I've tried to convince you over and over that grammar, spelling, and content are bullocks! (Or at least overrated). Nah, she's good. And today's post was so spot on, I invite you all for a little blog hop over to 50 Lessons In Parenting Young Kids.

For me, I was all "WORD!" on the following:

4. Don’t use Google to diagnose illnesses. Ever.

6. The terrible twos are bullshit. The terribleness lasts through at least age four. Or, forever.

10. Don’t buy bunk beds, unless you have absolutely no choice.

17. Accept the fact that you will turn into your mother.

26. The four year old check-up is brutal.

Let me just interject and provide a recommendation to #26 as we went through it first-hand this week.
  • Don't warn your 4-year-old of the pending doctor's appointment. He'll tell you he "no longer has a headache."
  • Oh, and have your husband take him so that the said 4-year-old doesn't absorb your anxiety knowing he is going to get FOUR SHOTS (yup, I'm one of those terrible vaccinators), have to PEE IN A CUP (that's a fun parenting experience apparently), GET BLOOD DRAWN, and do EYE AND EAR SCREENING.
  • Bring a 2-year-old for entertainment; especially when you are trying to get a clean-catch of urine from a 4-year-old who is terrified of the office potty.

Thankfully, he's healthy, normal and his only memory of the experience was the lollipop he got from the nurse. And yes, we have confirmation that he is just painfully shy. Dr. G. Love (that's no joke. It's his real abbreviated name Eric came up with) gave Eric advice for me: "get over it." Although I am less inclined to fear speech therapy, I'm now overwhelmed with the anticipation of finding "little person" summer camps and conventions for shorty. He gained some ground with weight (20+ percentile with a hefty 33lbs!), but his current height trajectory puts him at 5'7" after puberty.

38. Walk away from temper tantrums. Or, record them for future enjoyment.

49. A bathroom in a house with boys will never smell clean.

1 comment:

  1. Goodness! Scary Mommy's posts are very funny - the funny that comes from truth presented with humor. I agree about bunk beds. They are a nightmare to change. No wonder college kids in bunks only change the sheets once a semester (at least he told me he changed them...).
    The boy toilets and smelly bathrooms are true, too. I remember trying signs (once they were old enough to read), threats, bribes, rewards, all to no avail.
    Not to worry about Miles's diminutive size. First, we most often found that our smallest children had the most delightful personalities as if they had to make themselves known despite their small statures. Second, Seth was distraught with the Pediatrician, predicted that he would be smaller than 5'8", and he surpassed that. It took forever for him to hit his growing spurt, but he did. Miles comes from a long line of us who grew late but achieved respectable heights.
    It sounds like an exhausting 4 year old check up! There is no way around it, it's not fun! Kudos to Eric and the boys for surviving.