Thursday, November 21, 2013

Pssst...

Hey.
 
Yeah.
 
I'm still here. Just kicking arse and taking names at this whole 3 kid, full time job, domestic goddess, dairy cow gig.
 
Okay, by taking names and kicking arse, what I really mean is hunting for babysitter names and wiping bums.
 
Same diff, no?
 
It's been a flurry of activity in our house and I am not sure with the holidays creeping up it will get any better. Blog posts are, unfortunately, last on my list of to dos. And not for a lack of material. I traveled to Boston with just Gus, we've had our first "he's not my friend/he's a bully" incident, and we've also had more moments of kids say the darndest things than normal. Oh, and I met my first ever blog friend.
 
But currently? It's 1am and I'm avoiding disinfecting my pump parts for work tomorrow. And I just realized I didn't eat dinner. #thankgodforbananasandnutella
Where's that dish fairy when you need her? And doesn't she moonlight as a short order cook?
 
Until I get a better grip on the tasks like functioning at my job and keeping my kids alive, I'll leave you with the latest "Felix Funny" from Eric taking him to school:
 
Felix: Daddy, it smells like cold out here.
Daddy: What does that smell like?
Felix: Ice.
Daddy: What does that smell like?
Felix: Water.
Daddy: What does that smell like?
Felix: Penguins, because they are sooooo chilly.
 
Carry on...

Tuesday, November 12, 2013

Rag-tag

It's the first year the littles' childcare is doing school pictures.

And guess whose kids went to school today looking like garbage?

And it's not that I don't have a comb to put to the littles' heads, it's that when triaging "brushes" at 7am the toothbrush comes before the hair brush when rushing out the door.

And it's not that I don't have cute coordinating button down shirts and sweaters for Felix and Gus to rock for the "sibling shot", it's just that there is a mountain of clean laundry doing the very important job of protecting my couch cushions from Annie's cheddar bunnies, dirty bottoms, and my vacuuming.

And it's not that I don't care or that the center didn't send out multiple reminders (including the day before), it's that I downright forgot.

***

Sometimes I have an out of body experience and look on myself and think--"you've become that mom." You know, the one I used to feel no connection to, and shake my head when I saw her with a gaggle of kids in the store who weren't matching or behaving. I mean, I was a professional babysitter for well over a decade and had better luck and control.

Note to self--babysitters and aunts/uncles are very different from parents.

***

I took all 3 kids to Costco this weekend by myself--thankyouverymuch--one was wearing a transformers costume that now has holes all over it from his "transforming", one had size 5T jeans on that were so large, that they would fall straight to his ankles when he was standing so I forced him to sit in the over sized cart the whole adventure, and one was in the ergo with only 1 sock and I am pretty sure had some Plum Organics mango biscuit conditioning his hair.

Oh, and it was 5pm.

I never claimed that motherhood made me more reasonable.

My car has opened bags of pretzels in the car seats and half full organic juice boxes on the floor (it's like the tree/forest question: if a juice box is organic, does it make a mess?), and on some days, I panic that one of those hoarding cable shoes is secretly taping me for their season premiere.

So all you moms who I was all judgey mcjudgerson about not having all of your kids perfectly behaved and dressed and organizing compostable boxes of free range, organic, locally grown, fair trade snack packs from the grocery store.

I'm sorry.

Friday, November 8, 2013

Wet Willy

We had to forgo professional family photos this year because, well, we like to live in our house and still needed to pay the mortgage. So I dusted off the old DSLR and attempted to get photos of my kids for holiday cards.

FAIL.

So anyone in receipt of our holiday card will notice the pictures are small. Many from Instagram, and perhaps another year we will get someone else to do the dirty work of making my kids less...cray.

That being said, there were a few gems that made me giggle. Totally not holiday card style, but "this is really what my family is like" photo. But not in the artsy fartsy way.

In a wet willy way.

And with the week I am about to have at work, I am sure when this posts on Friday I'll enjoy laughing over this repeatedly.