Tuesday, November 12, 2013


It's the first year the littles' childcare is doing school pictures.

And guess whose kids went to school today looking like garbage?

And it's not that I don't have a comb to put to the littles' heads, it's that when triaging "brushes" at 7am the toothbrush comes before the hair brush when rushing out the door.

And it's not that I don't have cute coordinating button down shirts and sweaters for Felix and Gus to rock for the "sibling shot", it's just that there is a mountain of clean laundry doing the very important job of protecting my couch cushions from Annie's cheddar bunnies, dirty bottoms, and my vacuuming.

And it's not that I don't care or that the center didn't send out multiple reminders (including the day before), it's that I downright forgot.


Sometimes I have an out of body experience and look on myself and think--"you've become that mom." You know, the one I used to feel no connection to, and shake my head when I saw her with a gaggle of kids in the store who weren't matching or behaving. I mean, I was a professional babysitter for well over a decade and had better luck and control.

Note to self--babysitters and aunts/uncles are very different from parents.


I took all 3 kids to Costco this weekend by myself--thankyouverymuch--one was wearing a transformers costume that now has holes all over it from his "transforming", one had size 5T jeans on that were so large, that they would fall straight to his ankles when he was standing so I forced him to sit in the over sized cart the whole adventure, and one was in the ergo with only 1 sock and I am pretty sure had some Plum Organics mango biscuit conditioning his hair.

Oh, and it was 5pm.

I never claimed that motherhood made me more reasonable.

My car has opened bags of pretzels in the car seats and half full organic juice boxes on the floor (it's like the tree/forest question: if a juice box is organic, does it make a mess?), and on some days, I panic that one of those hoarding cable shoes is secretly taping me for their season premiere.

So all you moms who I was all judgey mcjudgerson about not having all of your kids perfectly behaved and dressed and organizing compostable boxes of free range, organic, locally grown, fair trade snack packs from the grocery store.

I'm sorry.


  1. I like the idea of protecting your couch with piles of laundry! And I long ago learned that I made a way better and different teacher after having children than before. As you note, it's easy to judge when you don't have children of your own...

  2. I thought you might like to read this essay: http://www.brainchildmag.com/2013/11/the-mom-i-used-to-be/