Sunday, January 12, 2014

Week 2 of 52

I've quoted Walter Kornbluth from Splash before, but...
What a week I'm having!

If it wasn't work drama, then it was incompetent people at the DMV (mixed with a little expired passport), or gas station crises, and low grade fevers. And turning 34. Oh...and Felix decided to celebrate his first week as a 4-year-old by getting stitches. It happened on a Friday that turned out to feel more like a Monday. Let me break it down for you--cliff notes style.

  • 7:45 am. The kids are all dropped off at school, and I am working remotely.
  • My work e-mail and network have apparently been attacked by zombies and don't work.
  • Eric calls and tells me that Felix ran into a door and has a huge gaping gash on his head.
  • I rush down to school and get stuck behind construction equipment while my child hemorrhaging. (Okay, he wasn't bleeding profusely anymore, but it adds to the urgency.)
  • I drive him to an urgent care center and take out an old credit card from the depths of my wallet to pay the co-pay because the one time in the past 4 months I went to Target, SOMEONE STOLE OUR ACCOUNT and we were waiting for our new credit card.  
  • The receptionist informs me my credit card expired in 2010. Oops.
  • We go back into the room after the payment situation was resolved, and after cleaning his wound, the Dr puts on a numbing cream and says she will be back in 20 to give him stitches.
  • Felix has to go to the bathroom. 
  • Felix's penis decides to stick to his scrotum and he says "uh-oh Mommy!" as urine floods the floor and saturates his pants so he is essentially sporting a urine fanny pack when he pulls his pants up. 
  • Felix screams that he doesn't want to wear his pants while I furiously try to clean up the floor mess with 1-ply toilet paper.
  • I take him out of the room in his saturated undies and ask if I can go out to my car to look for additional clothing.
  • I have ZERO spare clothes in my car as it's been over a year since we've dealt with potty training.
  • I remember that a friend put in 12-18 month clothing in Felix's school bag for me to give to Gus. And that bag is in the examining room.
  • I shove Felix into 12-18 month old pants and an 18 month old shirt, but not before the doctor walks back in while Felix is completely naked and I am crouched down trying to shove my 4 year old in toddler clothes.
  • I'll spare you the procedure explanation...but let's just say that holding a 4 yo down while he screams "I HATE THIS PLACE" and gets shots of lidocaine and stitches in his head was *not* on my bucket list.

I'll give you 1 guess how long it took for Felix to be back to normal. He spent the afternoon watching movies from his cardboard birthday rocket ship (picture below was taken before the fight with the school door).

I took quite a few photos with my camera this week and feel like I can earn the "import to Lightroom" merit badge. (Although, I am having serious anxiety over not importing to iPhoto anymore. Like, I stay up at night and freak out about how my photos are stored.) And as you can see, I found the "B+W" button. Now about all of those other sliders, functions, and steps. 

Gus: early morning "sleep lines"
Gus: bath wonderment
Gus: my walking companion
Miles: the underbite
Miles: baby blue eyes
Miles: track workout

2 down, 50 to go...


  1. O.M.G. I had no idea about all of the glorious pee-covered details of your head gash emergency room visit. That is... brutal. SUPERMAMA.

    Pictures are perfect, as always.

  2. Oh goodness! It was not funny at the time, and probably isn't to you even now, but what a hilarious account! I cannot tell you how many times in my parenting life that quote "What a Week I'm having!" echoed through my mind and helped me stay sane. The stitching incident reminds me of poor Nicholas crying in pain as the sadistic pediatrician stitched him up while firmly stating in her thick German accent - "That doesn't hurt!"
    Last, you will have to tell about the new photo thing-y. I am not familiar with it and will stick with iPhoto for now...